The Game of Love

In preparation of our big upcoming move, we've been going through a lot of old junk deciding what to keep and what to get rid of.  I was moving some boxes to the dining room when I saw my big purple tote.  In this tote is all kinds of things, including but not limited to old journals dating back to middle school.  Yes, I would be crazy embarrassed if ANYONE ever read them, partly because I was so immature and my priorities were way out of order.  So why the title of this post? You see, without naming any names, I was "inspired" by a relationship status change from Facebook as well as seeing all my old journals from school.

I've always desired to be loved.  Wanted to be held in high esteem by one man...FOREVER.  Desired to be treated with honor and respect.  Wanted the desires of my heart to be anther's priority as well.  And no matter how many guys I went on dates with, told my deepest darkest secrets to and even shared my heart with, only ONE chose to pursue me and make me his FOREVER.  But way before that ever happened, I believed a lie.  I was told that no guy would ever want me if I didn't date.  Well, let me just tell you, even when I was a teenager, dating wasn't what it used to be!  Love is NOT a game; dating is NOT marriage.  However, way too often, we mistake dating for love.  And love IS a choice, not just an emotion - especially when it comes to marriage.  It is a choice that is made despite how one looks when then first wake up, despite their spending habits, despite their how they were raised.

So, here are a couple of ways dating needs to change, in my opinion.  For one, there must be an element of mystery, not secrets.  The other person doesn't have, or need, to know all your deepest darkest secrets.  However, there should be honesty between the two.  With dating, there should be a mutual respect but not exclusive rights.  You aren't vowing to another person to LOVE them FOREVER, that is marriage! Second, don't make dating a mini-marriage. Dating is a conditional relationship with established boundaries and a potential end.  Marriage is an unconditional relationship without boundaries that is an eternal covenant.

Here I am thinking about all the times people told me this (before I met the Love of my life!) and I let it go in one ear and out the other.  And after seeing the FB status change and all my old journals, well, I was reminded that God is love.  He does not play games with us, especially when it comes to His love for us.  He desires us to trust Him and to know Him fully.  This doesn't happen just dating God.  He requires our time and attention.  You don't fall in love and choose to stay in love over chance, random meetings with little or no communication.  It's the same in our relationship with God.  It's not like a FB relationship status.  It's not complicated, He will not divorce us, nor will He leave us single if we are desiring Him.  It drives me crazy when I ask my husband why he loves me and he answers, "Because I choose to." But honestly, he's so right.  It's the same way with God, He is Love and He chooses to love us (John 3:16).  So remember, love isn't a game...be careful what you make of it.